
Dakshindari Youth Durga Puja successful South Dum Dum — dedicated to acerb onslaught survivors
Kolkata’s streets and the pursuit of emotion during Durga Puja are chopped from the aforesaid cloth, a cloth of accidental and inevitability. Every incorrect crook mightiness unfastened similar a trapdoor — into an ornate, never-seen-before pandal, oregon into the orbit of a alien whose glimpse lingers a heartbeat excessively agelong successful the bhog (offering) queue. The newness of the play feels conspiratorial: the thrill of a archetypal brushwood oregon a perfectly timed conscionable cute. Or connected Navami, erstwhile the fume of Sandhi Puja coils astir the fading festivities, determination is simply a lingering ache, a reminder of a emotion that ne'er rather blossomed. By Dashami, arsenic the goddess herself departs for her sojourn, 1 mightiness adjacent beryllium ghosted by the Hinge day who promised truthful much.
For generations, Durga Puja has been much than a festival. It has been Kolkata’s astir antiauthoritarian signifier for societal life, a abstraction wherever young men and women exchanged glances astatine Maddox Square, oregon struck up conversations nether the neon lights of Ballygunge Cultural. It was, successful galore ways, Bengal’s archetypal societal network, its archetypal dating app even.

Dum Dum Tarun Dal pandal
The metropolis has changed, and the pandals with it — elemental structures present reborn arsenic spectacles acceptable for a biennale but the pulse remains. Parents who erstwhile recovered emotion successful puja clubs person children who swipe close earlier stepping retired to hop pandals. Courtship has shifted from adda to algorithm, yet pujo remains Kolkata’s canvas for encounters some aged and new.
“I retrieve seeing him for the archetypal clip astatine a pujo pandal,” recalls 57-year-old Anisha Shaw (name changed), who met her husband, Ashish Basu (name changed), astatine Shib Mandir’s puja pandal successful 1996. “Pujo was simpler then. We friends circled astir the pandal for hours of adda (conversation), helped with the bhog, ferried buckets of water, and fried beguni (aubergine fritters) successful elephantine kadhais (utensils). Someone’s relative would beryllium sent moving to Gariahat to fetch much mustard lipid oregon kasundi (mustard). It was that benignant of Pujo. Ashish and I kept moving into each other. A twelvemonth later, we were married.”

Mishka Basu
In contrast, Anisha’s daughter, 27-year-old sous cook Mishka Basu (name changed), met her fiancé connected Bumble successful 2024. Their romance began with a close swipe and a archetypal day astatine AM PM connected Park Street. Where their parents’ emotion communicative unfolded betwixt alpanas and serving tables, theirs began successful an app’s chat window.
Algorithms earlier anjali (prayers)
“So successful your world, multiplication is the aforesaid arsenic division?” That was the archetypal enactment 29-year-old technologist Arpan Majumdar sent to 26-year-old IT-healthcare nonrecreational Sailanki Nandy connected Tinder — a witty notation to her microbiology background. “In compartment biology, ‘division’ is erstwhile a genitor compartment splits into 2 girl cells, which really multiplies their number,” she explains. “I melted close then,” Sailanki laughs. “I’d chatted with truthful galore boys, but nary 1 bothered to constitute thing clever similar that. Now radical usage AI-generated lines.”
Sailanki had dabbled successful dating apps similar Bumble and OkCupid during college, logging successful “for a spot of validation” and deleting them aft a fewer days. But successful the long, lonely months of COVID-19 successful 2020, she decided to springiness Tinder a superior try.

A young pistillate poses for pictures astatine a Durga Puja pandal, themed connected the ‘Maha Alaye Maa’, successful Kolkata | Photo Credit: Manvender Vashist Lav
“Arpan was staying astatine his sister’s location successful Jadavpur, and I was successful Behala. He’s from Barrackpore, but our radii overlapped, and we matched,” she recalls.
Durga Puja, she says, has ever held heavy meaning. “I grew up successful a associated family. Puja meant cousins coming backmost to the metropolis followed by loud, festive days.” Their archetypal pujo unneurotic was successful 2021. “We planned to conscionable connected Ashtami — maine successful a sari, him successful a panjabi (kurta). But helium got nutrient poisoning connected Saptami. I told him to rest, but that nighttime helium insisted, ‘Chol, North Kolkata te thakur dekhte jai’ – let’s spell spot the pandals successful North Kolkata. I thought helium was crazy. He travelled from Barrackpore contempt being unwell, conscionable truthful we could meet. We queued for 1 large pandal, but I said, ‘If you request a loo break, we’ll beryllium stuck successful a oversea of people!’ So we ducked into a café nearby, sitting adjacent to the restroom, laughing astir it.”
On Dashami greeting they yet went pandal-hopping successful South Kolkata, and afterward Arpan came location to conscionable her family. “That was our archetypal Pujo together,” she says.
“He is the kindest idiosyncratic I’ve ever met — truthful genuine. His Tinder opening enactment inactive makes maine grin silly. Next twelvemonth we are getting married. This Pujo we volition beryllium backmost successful Kolkata to speech astir our wedding,” Sailanki adds.
User behaviour
Speaking astir dating patterns during the festive season, Chandni Gaglani, Indian dating app Aisle’s caput of concern observes wide “pre- and station festival” waves. “We spot aggravated intent setting,” she explains. “People update bios, refine filters, adjacent tweak region oregon connection preferences to abbreviated database matches earlier celebrations begin. Usage frequence spikes, past dips erstwhile Durga Puja is successful afloat swing, erstwhile everyone is absorbed successful household and community. After the festival, there’s a beauteous reflection period.”
Chandni notes that social, community-driven festivals exert a precise antithetic propulsion than planetary occasions specified arsenic Valentine’s Day. “These moments are profoundly taste and rooted successful belonging,” she says. “They pat into thing cardinal astir individuality and community.”
Kolkata, she adds, sees the highest pistillate information connected the dating app. “The metropolis has ever had a romantic, intelligence civilization wherever relationships are treated arsenic superior endeavours. We spot that successful however thoughtfully users trade profiles and conversations,” remarks Chandni.
Aisle’s users scope from ages 18 to 50, but the largest radical is the 26 to 35 demographic astir inclined toward agelong word commitment. “This cohort has typically moved distant from their hometowns, established careers, and present seeks meaningful partnerships connected their ain terms,” Chandni explains.
On the exertion side, she emphasises that Aisle’s algorithm “takes signals from idiosyncratic enactment and adapts accordingly, but the prime and power ever stay with our users.” The app’s For You conception is curated not conscionable by property oregon location, she says, but by “shared values and interests. Such signals rise the likelihood of existent compatibility alternatively than simply showing everyone who fits wide criteria.”

Raja Ravi Varma inspired pandal successful Tricone Park
Across Age Groups
Thirty-eight-year-old Purnendu Guha (name changed), a newsman successful Kolkata, has been utilizing dating apps since 2020, a twelvemonth aft his divorce.
“Being a reporter, I don’t person capable clip to spell retired connected dates, and I can’t truly day radical from my workplace,” helium says. “But gathering idiosyncratic during pujo is different. Across those 5 days, I get to interact with the idiosyncratic thoroughly, spot however they respond to art, however they interact with people, grip wealth portion buying from vendors, and if they’re checking different radical out,” helium laughs.
“For me, pujo makes dating safer excessively since it’s each successful nationalist spaces. I person been doing this each twelvemonth since 2020. No brushwood has culminated into a narration yet, but I’ve made bully friends who stock my values and my involvement successful art. When you conscionable idiosyncratic successful a café, the clip is short, and the speech stays connected the surface. But during pujo, with longer hours and changeless brushes with civilization and art, I find some of america unfastened up more.”
This year, helium already has a plan. “I’m gathering my day astatine a Raja Ravi Varma themed pandal successful Tricone Park,” helium says, smiling. “I already person butterflies!”
Speaking of however pujo has changed, 33-year-old bundle engineers Kaustav and Arjoyita Banerjee callback a antithetic time. The 2 began dating successful 2010 aft sparking a romance connected Orkut.
“Back then, you could really basal successful beforehand of a pandal and instrumentality it each in,” Kaustav says. “Now it’s adjacent stampede crowds, you hardly get a infinitesimal to look astatine the decorations, fto unsocial conscionable idiosyncratic new.” After a decennary of dating and six years of marriage, the mates present prefers hosting a location enactment during pujo alternatively of braving the crush outside.
A consciousness of anonymity inactive matters, says Megha Palit, a 34-year-old lawsuit planner and lesbian who meets women mostly done dating apps. “Hinge is wherever the archetypal hullo happens,” she explains, “but pujo is wherever you find retired if the chemistry is real. You tin rotation Maddox Square astatine midnight, clasp someone’s hand, and nary 1 knows whether you’re conscionable friends oregon thing more.”
She remembers her assemblage years, agelong earlier swipes and matches, erstwhile Durga Puja was the lone spot she could hazard a cheeky flirtation with different woman. “It’s crowded, anonymous, and oddly protective,” she says. “The metropolis is truthful engaged worshipping the goddess it forgets to constabulary you. Even now, aft we’ve matched online, that’s wherever I instrumentality a day first. In the mediate of the lights and the dhak, you tin respire and possibly autumn a small successful love.”

Sreejita and Aditya
Sreejita Chakraborty, a 28-year-old entrepreneur, and her 32-year-old husband, Aditya Sengupta, a income strategist, met connected Tinder successful 2021.
“Being a Bengali who grew up successful Delhi, pujo for maine ever meant 4 packed days astatine CR Park,” Aditya says.
“Sreejita is from Kolkata and my archetypal pujo with her was truthful special,” recalls Aditya. After their marriage, helium remembers a infinitesimal that stayed with him, “As our formation descended upon the Kolkata skyline, the agleam lights beneath felt similar they were speaking to me.”
Over the years, arsenic their narration deepened, Pujo has taken connected a richer meaning. “It’s not conscionable astir romanticist love,” helium says. “Now it’s astir wheeling my 90-year-old grandma done the pandals, due to the fact that the joyousness of discovering caller pandals and appreciating the artistry of each means small unless it’s shared with family,” smiles Aditya.
Kolkata has ever near its doors ajar for enigma and awe to rotation in. Durga Puja takes the bosom of its radical and blurs the scope of immersive experiences each year. The goddess comes and goes but leaves down a 1000 tiny awakenings. Apps whitethorn commencement the speech now, but the existent magic inactive happens nether those restless, fevered nights erstwhile Kolkata forgets itself and remembers desire.

Girls click a selfie | Photo Credit: ANI

8 months ago
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